Posts Tagged ‘Shawn Sheep The Soccer Star’

Coaching Issues

Monday, March 29th, 2010

Try This At Home…………………….

Evaluate your child’s coach.  Have your child write down three things he likes about his coach and three things he doesn’t like. If necessary, have him elaborate on his answers.  Next, you rate his coaches on a scale of 1-5, with 5 being the highest, in the following categories.  Values and morals, communication skills, positive attitude, language choices, fairness, ability to teach and promote teamwork, sportsmanship, ability to physically prepare the kids, ability to motivate, compatibility with your child.  If your child is old enough to understand, he can rate his coach as well.  Don’t share your answers until you are both finished.  If your child’s answers, or any of your ratings, are alarming, it may be time to make a change.

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We all put great thought into which daycare or babysitter we leave our young child with.  We want to make sure our child is safe and happy and that the morals and values of the caregiver are similar to ours.  We need to put just as much thought into who is coaching our child.  Coaches do more than assign kid’s positions on the field, run drills, and help get your child physically ready for the demand of his sport.  A coach is in the position to instill values and morals in your child, and set examples in areas like teamwork, sportsmanship and work ethic.  The odds are your child will look up to his coach and will emulate him or her. 

At all the national events throughout my entire cycling career, one of the ever present coaches was a hot headed, offensive coach who displayed all sorts of poor sportsmanship.  My first encounter with him was at Junior Nationals and unfortunately I continued to “run” into him until I retired from cycling.  For the life of me I can’t understand why anyone would choose him as their coach.  While some of his riders did get some good results, there were several other coaches who could get the job done just as well.  I found it interesting that adults submitted themselves to his antics and behavior, but just plain appalling that parents subjected their children to it.  Even if they thought he was the best coach out there, I can’t believe they would leave their children in his care.  By doing so they were telling their child that they condoned the coach’s behavior.

Part of the importance of sport, and the whole point of my blog, is to utilize sports to teach the fundamentals and building blocks needed to succeed in all areas of life. I think that one of the most important thing sports can instill in your child, is the deep founded belief that more important than winning, is how you play the game.  This lesson, while it may not always put him on top, will ensure that he can always be proud of who he is and what he accomplished.  The coaches you allow to work with your child over the course of his life will play a big part in laying the foundation for his values and morals. A good coach will reinforce positive sportsmanship and values and a bad coach will do just the opposite. 

In an individual sport you have a lot of discretion as to who you choose as your child’s coach.  For team sports that may not always be the case.  If you have an issue with your child’s coach, you may have an opportunity to switch leagues or teams, but if that isn’t an option, you still have a few choices.  Being interactive is the most important part.  Know what is going on at practice and games so you can discuss any situations that arise with your child. Talk with other parents to see if they have had similar experiences with the coach.  At a time when everyone is calm and rational, you can have a discussion with the coach.  You don’t need to attack him or her, just voice your concern.  You can also raise your concerns with the league.  If you don’t have any other options, and you feel very strongly about the affect a coach is having on your child, you can always try a different sport. 

The odds are, while a coach may not be your favorite for one reason or another, he or she isn’t all that bad, but it is important for parents to be aware and involved.

My children’s book, Shawn Sheep The Soccer Star, focuses on teamwork and sportsmanship.  In the book, the soccer coach is an excellent example of an exemplary coach.  The book is a good way to start a discussion with your child about these topics. 

For more information about me or my children’s books, please visit www.erinmirabella.com.

I’m taking next week off for spring break.  Please check back for my next post on April 12th.

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Someone Is Always Watching

Monday, March 1st, 2010

This At Home……….

Without asking for specifics, as your child to think about a time when they did something that they regretted doing in public.  Have them imagine how much worse it would have been, if it were broadcast for the whole world to see.  If he wants to share the details that’s fine, but respect his privacy. Ask him how his actions affected him and how he thinks they may have affected others. (Family, friends, coach, etc.)

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Even if you’re not famous, someone is always watching.  You never know how your actions, good or bad, will affect those around you.  It could be as simple as your child watching how you react to a driver who cuts you off in traffic, or a stranger watching you help another stranger.  Help your child understand that their actions have consequences and that one moment of carelessness, in some cases, can have huge repercussions. 

With today’s technology, even for the “unknown,’ there really aren’t any private moments in public places.  Help your child understand the these days everyone has a camera, because everyone has a cell phone. His behavior, good or bad, is literally just a keystroke away from being in cyber space for everyone to see. If you are famous, or at least temporarily in the spotlight, it is even more crucial for you to think before you act. 

I was planning to write about seizing the moment, but I just saw a story on Geraldo At Large, on Fox, about all of the athletes gone wild at the Olympic Village, and felt compelled to blog about it.

Every Olympics there is a news story about all of the condoms shipped to the Olympic Village and a story about some athlete who gets a little too out of control. 

This Olympics the spot light is on the American snowboarder, Scotty Lago.  After winning the bronze medal, he went out to celebrate in Vancouver.  Someone shot a picture of him behaving questionably, and after its release on the internet, he volunteered to leave the Olympic Village, presumably with some pressure from the United States Olympic Committee.

The hot topic seems to be whether or not the Olympic Committee overreacted, but I prefer to focus on the lesson.  However, I do feel compelled to say this, when at the Olympics, athletes are representing more than themselves.  It’s natural for athletes to want to blow off steam after four years of preparation, and the huge let down that comes when all the pressure is off after competition.  However, athletes need to remember that while they are at competitions, they represent more than just themselves. They represent their families, sponsors and their country.  So, regardless of whether or not you think what Scotty did is worthy of getting booted from the Olympic Village, you have to take into account how it reflects on the other parties involved.  We know how the Olympic Committee reacted, but I can only imagine how his sponsors and family felt.   For some celebrities, even bad press is a good thing. For others, like Olympians and Tiger Woods, whose image is built on being wholesome and squeaky clean, it has the potential to be damaging.  (I say potential, because sometimes the public is surprisingly forgiving.)

Remind your child that besides having to deal with the consequences of his actions, he also potentially affects others around him, including  family, friends, team and school.  There is nothing wrong with having some fun, but there is also nothing wrong with keeping it under control and acting responsibly.

For younger children, my book, Shawn Sheep The Soccer Star, is a great way to start a discussion about how a person’s, “or sheep’s” behavior can affect those around him.  Please visit www.erinmirabella.com for more information about my children’s books.

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Posted in Role Models, Sportsmanship, values and morals | 3 Comments »

Eating to maximize performance

Monday, December 14th, 2009

Try this at home…………..

Have your child keep a journal of what she eats for a week.  This isn’t meant to encourage her to go on a diet, only to make her more aware of what she is eating.  Encourage her to eat normally throughout the week; it isn’t a helpful exercise if she alters her eating habits because she is recording he food intake.  At the end of the week help her analyze her meals.  Stick to the basics, is she eating well rounded meals?  Is she getting enough fruits, vegetables, protein and dairy?  Are her pre and post workout meals the best choices for optimum performance?  This isn’t just about sports.  Eating good meals can help her focus better during tests as well.

Based on her journal have her pick two things to change.  Maybe she is going to incorporate a recovery drink into her post-workout routine, try to eat one more serving of fruits and vegetables every day, or eat more protein before she works out/competes/tests. (adding some veggies to a fruit smoothie is a great option for picky eaters.)

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If it’s true that you are what you eat, then today I am a Christmas cookie, because I have had absolutely no will power. 

During my ten-year career as an elite athlete, I met athletes that ran the gamete from health nut to junk food junkie.  I tended to be right in the middle.  I ate well balanced meals, but since I have a major sweet tooth, I didn’t deny myself the occasional treat.  My philosophy is everything in moderation. If however, you and your family eat on the healthier end of the spectrum, keep it up.  Certainly making healthier choices is beneficial.

My husband, Chris, coached me from 2000-2006 and most of my education and direction on nutrition comes from him.  He is a chiropractor and certified strength and conditioning coach.  (And he thinks it’s fun to read all the latest research on nutrition and supplements.) Here are Chris’ top four eating musts for workouts, competition and exams. 

Top Four Eating Musts

1. Eat both protein and carbohydrates before workouts, competitions, and tests. Simple sugars, like cereal or pancakes, break down very quickly and the burst of energy they give you is generally short lived.  Protein, complex carbohydrates, like whole wheat foods and foods high in fiber, break down more slowly and give you longer lasting energy.  Here is an example of two of my favorite pre-race meals: Two eggs any style, whole wheat toast, yogurt and a banana.  Or, oatmeal mixed with a scoop of vanilla protein powder, a yogurt and banana. .  (Try to chose a yogurt higher in protein, like Stonyfield’s Oikos Greek yogurt.)

2. In the first thirty minutes after your workout or competition, have a recovery drink.  Recovery drinks get into you system quickly.  Timing of the drink is important for recovery, because in the first thirty minutes after exercise your body is driving nutrients into your muscles.  There are many different drink mixes out there; chose one that has simple sugars and fast absorbing protein, like whey.  A four to one ratio of carbohydrates to protein is ideal.  A good drink generally has about 200-400 calories.  Make sure to follow up your drink with a meal an hour or two later.  While not perfect, a cheap alternative to a recovery drink mix is chocolate milk.

3. Eat and drink often during exercise.  The general rule is, if you are hungry or  thirsty you waited too long.  Try to eat something, a energy gel for example, and drink a bottle of water or energy drink, every hour you exercise.  Believe me, bonking is miserable.  I’ve gotten to the point before, in both training and races, that my body just quit and I couldn’t think even coherently; I was pretty much useless.

4. Make sure you give your food enough time to digest before you exercise. Everyone is different, but I generally ate about two and half to three hours before I competed.  I found when I was nervous, my food digested slower and once I started warming up, my food didn’t digest at all.  All the blood went to my legs atnthat point.

Here are some additional tips.

Taking a multi-vitamin is a good idea when you are training hard, just to ensure you are getting all of the appropriate nutrients. 

Fish oil is a natural anti-inflammatory.  When I was training hard, my legs would throb every night.  I often couldn’t sleep, so I would take ibuprofen every night.  Once I started taking two fish oil every night, and morning, I needed ibuprofen much less often.  (If you find you are burping up the fish oil, they sell odorless fish oil capsules, which sometimes make the fish oil more manageable.  Or you can try just taking the fish oil at night.)

Both of my children’s books, Gracie Goat’s Big Bike Race and Shawn Sheep The Soccer Star, include a fitness fact.  One book’s fitness fact is on hydration and the other is on nutrition.  They are a great help in starting a discussion with your child on healthy eating and drinking habits.  Visit www.erinmirabella.com for more information.  For more information on my husband, Chris Mirabella, D.C. please visit www.tellercountychiropractic.com.

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Curing cockiness

Monday, December 7th, 2009

Try This At Home……………..

Cut decent size holes in the top of two identical, empty boxes.  (Tissue boxes would work well.) Leave the first box as is, and on the second, tape plastic wrap over the hole from the inside.  Have your child sit with the first box about an arms length in front of him.  Have him close his eyes.  When you say go, he should open his eyes and drop a ball into the box as fast as he can.  Make sure it’s something he can easily do.  Each time he gets a ball into the box he gets a skittle, or some other kind of treat. (Don’t let him eat it yet.) After he’s done it successfully 3 times, raise the stakes. Tell him that you are going to make it more exciting.  This time he has a choice.  Before he drops the ball again, he can chose to receive one skittle as before or go for all or nothing.  Make sure that if he chooses the later, he understands that if he misses getting the ball into the hole he loses all of his skittles, and if he makes it you’ll double his total number of skittles.  Most kids will chose to take the gamble, but if not that is ok.  You can still finish the game. After he closes his eyes, switch the boxes out.  When you say go, he will open his eyes and drop the ball in as before, but the plastic wrap will prevent the ball from falling in.  If he took the gamble take all of his skittles away and tell him that this exercise showed the potential danger of being over confident.  Explain that there is a fine line between having a healthy self-confidence and being cocky, and that the game was designed to show him what can happen if he’s too confident in his abilities.  If he took the gamble, ask him what he was thinking when he decided to go for all or nothing.  Address his answer and if he needs help articulating it, suggest the following as the reason. Maybe he was having a lot of success dropping the ball into the box and thought that the gamble was a sure thing.  Explain that at some point in life he will find that he is really good at something and he may start to feel that he can’t lose, just like he felt after successfully dropping the ball in the hole three times. Explain that failure often happens when one starts to be too confident in his own abilities. Oftentimes cockiness leads to carelessness or causes him to underestimate a task or opponent.  Explain that the last time he played the game, when the ball didn’t fall in the hole, was a simulation of that failure.  Then, since you tricked him, let him enjoy his skittles.

If he didn’t take the gamble, then he only missed out on one skittle, but you can still explain the games lesson to him as above.

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Take the opportunity to discuss the following definitions with your child

Dictionary.com defines the following:

Humble:  not proud or arrogant; modest: to be humble although successful.

Self confident: realistic confidence in one’s own judgment, ability, power, etc.

Cocky: arrogant; pertly self-assertive; conceited: He walked in with a cocky air.

Having a realistic expectation and positive outlook of your abilities is a good thing.  Being confident in your abilities can make you very successful.  Everyone loves the successful, yet humble victor.  No one, on the other hand, is very fond of the cocky, obnoxious one. 
 
As I said, there is a very fine and sometimes gray line between a healthy self-confidence and over-confidence.

I like to think of it like this.  Self-confidence is just that, for self.  Understanding and being confident in your abilities will allow you to perform at your very best and accomplish peak performances in whatever you are doing.  To me, self-confidence has nothing to do with anyone else.  It shouldn’t mean you think your better than others, it should just be a realistic measure of what you are capable of. 

Here’s something that may help your child put things in perspective. In the end, no one really cares besides him and the people who love him. Ask him who won their specific event last year? Ask him who won it in the Olympics 8 years ago, or equivalent event? There is a good chance that he doesn’t know. People may remember successes for a short time, but in the end they forget, and the only one who still remembers is the actual winner.
 
Being over confident means you have lost sight of reality and have an inflated opinion of yourself.  It’s when you have started to think you are better than other’s because of your success.  One thing I’ve learned is that no matter how good you think you are, there is always someone better.  You just may not have met them yet.  You will get beat; it’s just a matter of time.  From my experience, the cockier someone is, the harder they fall. 

If your child is struggling with too much confidence/cockiness, the best medicine is losing.  If your child is in a league that is way below his level and his success is starting to go to his head, then maybe it’s time to move him up to the next level.  Winning is a good thing and a great self-confidence booster, but as I’ve said in previous blogs, no one learns nearly as much from winning as they do from losing.  Ironically, the way to make your child better, is for them to occasionally lose.  It keeps their ego in check and helps them raise their game.

Here are some other things to think about.

Do you want your child to receive a trophy regardless of whether on not they win or lose?

Do you gush over everything your child does, even if it isn’t worthy of it?

Are you setting a good example when it comes to being humble?  Are the coaches?

Is your child’s assessment of his ability realistic?  Is yours?

In an attempt to be humble, do you forget to praise your child for his accomplishments?

Having a humble spirit and heart is not an easy thing, especially following success.  While I am far from perfect at it, it is something I strive for. You will hopefully find your own solution; I find mine in my faith.  I believe that all of my talents are God given.  Therefore all of my success is God given and all I’m doing is attempting to maximize what God gave me.  I’ve found that for me, there is nothing more humbling than thinking about the sacrifice Jesus made for me on the cross and God’s grace for me when I fall on my face. 

My children’s book, Shawn Sheep The Soccer Star, is great for starting a conversation with your child about cockiness.  For more information or to purchase a book, please visit www.erinmirabella.com.

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Erin Mirabella

Thursday, September 10th, 2009
  • Two Time Olympic track cyclist.
  • Author of two children’s books in the Barnsville Sports Squad Series: Gracie Goat’s Big Bike Race and Shawn Sheep The Soccer Star.
  • Mother of two.
  • Recipient of The 2006 Jack Kelly Fair Play Award for sportsmanship.
  • 4th place in the 2004 Olympic Points Race.

This weekly blog is all about the fundamentals kids learn through sports that then help them in all aspects of their lives.  You’ve heard Robert Fulghum’s saying that All I Ever Need To Know About Life, I learned In Kindergarten.  I contend that everything you need to succeed in life you can learn through sports.  Each week I explore a new sports topic that matters to parents and kids.  Each post starts off with a TRY THIS AT HOME section that suggests an activity for parents to do at home with their kiddos.
 
During my Olympic cycling career, I watched myself and other Olympians struggle with different basic sports issues: teamwork, fear of failure, self confidence, sportsmanship, temptation to cheat, etc.  I always thought that if we had all learned the basics as kids, we could have saved ourselves a lot of time with the sports psychologist.  Give your kids a head start by discussing the blog topics with them each week.

When I created the Barnsville Sports Squad children’s book series, my goal was to create books that parents and teachers could use to entertain, inspire and teach their kids about sports, sportmanship, making healthy choices and life’s lessons.   This gives me another venue to reach out and do just that.

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